I wont talk much about being in an Orphanage (Ladywell) as a very small boy, or being abandoned in Banstead Surrey (Miles from home) by some strange woman, or having to go round the streets picking up Cigarette ends from the gutter that people had discarded for the next days Fags for my Dad. Never having a Christmas present until I was in my Twenties, or the very first present I ever had wrapped was a St Christopher from my Brother Jake for my 21st Birthday. Never having Christmas Decorations EVER as a child, never having a Christmas Tree as a child. Never having a T.V. until I was in my Teens. Or pretending to all my school friends that I had a Train Set, or Gun and Holster for Christmas, or Clothes for my Birthday, when we were given nothing, and had nothing. Times were MORE than hard straight after the War. Everything bought using a Ration Book, and no money in the first place. Anyway, enough of that right? But I Wasn't alone!

I got my first Guitar when I was aged 9. A £4 'Framus' Cello Style, 'F' Hole. From a second-hand shop in Queenstown Road Battersea. Neck like a God Damn tree trunk. Strings by 'Cathedral' (Do you remember them?) a pile of crap, but pocket money being a big fat zero in those days my Brother (Jake) and me used to go 'Dustbin Racking' around the local streets and picking up things to take to the junk shops to try and sell. Old Newspapers were the best to pick up, we got 3 pence (old money) for every 112 pounds in weight, so it took a while every Thursday Night to collect enough to buy a set of 'Cathedral Guitar String' priced at 1/11 (That's One Shilling and Eleven Pence Old Money...almost 0.10p our money now. So almost Four Hundred-Weight of News papers (that's 896 lbs in weight) for one set of strings. I used to use the 'Collar Bone' white plastic from shirt collars as a Plectrum, Pathetic I hear you say, mm. A length of washing line for the strap, then stand in front of Mum's dressing table mirror and pretend to be Elvis. We had LARGE patterned wallpaper on the Bedroom walls and in my 'Minds Eye' they became Tables with people sitting around them (similar to those you see on video's of Elvis in Las Vegas) and you know what...? Those childish dreams and fantasies DID become a reality for me when we Gigged Butlins, Holland, Belgium etc. Just NEVER give up on your dreams. You can change your wife, but you can't change your football team.

It was very hard back then (No sexual body item intended) to find ANYONE who could actually play guitar, not to mention getting Guitar lessons in any shape or form. I even had trouble tuning the damn thing back then. I did get some tips from various people and managed to tune the Guitar via the school Piano Teacher, and some basic chords by trial and error, Also looking at Record covers (Readings, Clapham Junction, Station Approach). Looking at Guitarist on them and seeing where they put their fingers (These weren't porn Mags remember). The hardest thing of all (no sexual member intended) playing a Guitar are not the Chords, or knowing the Fret names, it's what you do with your right hand (sex aside here) when holding the Plectrum. As all Guitarists know, you have to complement the High-Hat, Snare Drum and Bass Drum, also to match (between beats) the Bassist, and what HE does. Then blend them all together, and sound 'APART' from them both, to allow the Lead Guitarist to hear all three Musicians in unison and a complete Rhythm section. So, Guys, your right hand is more important than learning chords...ANYONE can learn WHERE to put their fingers (sex apart again here) on the Fret board and remember the name of the chord. But it comes in time (sex included) and it did Yep